HAPPY HALLOWEEN FROM SATAN AND SOME DEMONS

I totally stole this from TV Carnage (obviously) but the only thing they did to it was add their explosion at the end so suck it! I wish that jesus/satan/demons/god really did exist. It would make life way more exciting. I would also feel a lot more guilty probably, so yea...nevermind. Oh and what is the prayer to get levitated by demons...I want to go to there!

JAMES FRANCO FOR GUCCI

Hey guys...what is up with your lives...I am a bad blogger sometimes. Sometimes I don't blog stuff so good to many times enough. But James Franco is pretty funny. I wonder if he had to wait a year from when that commercial came out to be contractually allowed to make fun of it? If so I don't think that is fair because everybody else has been silently making fun of it for a year now...The original commercial after the break.

WHY DID I EAT THAT FAT BITCH

When I first heard about THE FAT BITCH sandwich I was all hearts n' smiles...Who wouldn't want a philly steak sandwich stuffed with french fries, mozzarella cheese sticks and jalapeno poppers (with a side of pretzels, WTF)? Not me, I would want that...unless I can go back in time to this morning and tell my much happier past self to "STAY THE FUCK AWAY". And not because it wasn't good (it wasn't at all) and not because I forgot to "hold the shrooms" (I DID forget) and not because it turned into cold sloppy mess within 74 seconds (It TOTALLY did)...No the reason I would tell myself to "not to go to there" is an hour after pumping lard right into my veins I have a powerfully spicy turd on deck that I am very worried is not going to be a turd at all but more like several gallons of hot brown lava. I know you are thinking to yourself that I should have seen that coming, who doesn't expect some anal repercussions after shoving 3 pounds of Fat Bitch into your gullet? Well in my excitement I didn't really think about it OK? And even if I DID think about it, I can live with an occasional asspolsion if the taste warrants it...but in the case of Fat Bitch vs. Shawn's Asshole the real loser was taste.


PS. I still love Mama Mia Pizza...just stick with the Pizza.

HEY...NOW WALK IT OUT

Well on the bright side she is probably going to stay in really good shape with all that running...and convulsing...and stuttering.

THIS WILL GIVE YOU NIGHTMARES

So I saw that Paranormal movie yesterday and it fucking sucked. It did have some "spooky" parts in it I guess but it could have been cut down to about 20 mins and shown as the preview for the movie I am going to make with this cat singing. It is going to be the scariest movie of all time. You will have nightmares. You will probably want to kill yourself before your next birthday just so you won't have to remember this video. But we all know that it doesn't matter since you will never be able to forget it in the first place...ever, at all.

JESUS IS SUCH A DICK...LOL

So I have seen this awesome jesus meme around the interwebs for a while now but I recently came upon a large number of them all in one place so I thought I would clean them off and throw them all up on this internet webzine for everyone to enjoy...as they are burning in hell.Check out the rest after the break.

MOTIVATE YOURSELF

I have gone through the painful process of searching the internet for funny "motivational" posters that might help you be more productive on a Friday...or not.

The internet is very misogynistic...right?

HERE ARE SOME PICTURES I FOUND ON THE INTERNET TODAY

Well it's Friday so that means a shit ton of pics dumped right into your computer screen. Enjoy your weekend nerds. And she is NEVER going to regret that tat...ever. It was a very good choice.

SUPPORT THE WAR EFFORT

That will be all...carry on.

SOME OLD WRESTLER IS DEAD OR SOMETHING

Do you know what is sadder than an old wrestler who died today? So so so many things, things like the genocide in Darfur and people that watch/love wrestling... like bigratthreeten in the above video. Go fuck yourselves.

NEW SITE DESIGN...WHAT DO YOU THINK?

So I completely redesigned the look of the site today. Not sure if I like it yet or not...It DOES pop though...right? I have not yet decided if it is burning my eyes out or if it just feels like it's burning my eyes out. Let me know if you like it or not. Should I switch it back to the old design? Should I try something totally different? Try leaving a comment for once and share you feelings?

THIS VIDEO MUSICAL WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE

I don't think I will ever be able to top this sweet ass "video musical". I can't really tell if he is actually singing this wonderful little ditty or if he just has his mouth covered with the mic. If anybody can translate this song please don't because I think that it might ruin it for me.

WEIRD PEOPLE, WEIRD PETS...A RETROSPECTIVE

First of all let me say that a random candid picture hanging out or just holding your pet is a normal thing to do (unless your cat is 200 pounds) and I would not find that weird in anyway. But setting up elaborate glamor shots with your monkey's is fucking weird and you deserve to made fun of on the internet.Check out the rest after the break...

GODDAMN CHICKEN!

He just want's his goddamn chicken...It is pretty cliche' to make fun of a fat dude freaking out over food. Give him a break, he waited half a fucking hour for his goddamn chicken and it STILL wasn't done.

FUNNY VIDEO ABOUT MOVIE COUPLES BREAKING UP

I know that you don't come to this site to watch videos I embedded from other sites that you probably already go to anyway but fuck it. Funny or Die has put out another comedy gem about what would happen if a couple of weirdos making a "rom com" started dating "for reals" then broke up during the press junket. As you can imagine the interviews would be super awkward since they would be asking all the questions about how they are a couple in movie and also in "real life" etc... This video is just a real hoot! I really think you should watch it and send it to all of your friends and copy the embedded code and put it on YOUR blog or facebook page. What funny things would you say to describe this video to YOUR friends so they would watch it? Right now this video is at 82% funny, let's see if we can get it up to around 87%...HUZZAH!